Nightmare Magazine, Issue 145 (October 2024) by Wendy N. Wagner
Author:Wendy N. Wagner
Language: eng
Format: epub
Publisher: Adamant Press
Published: 2024-09-23T20:06:19+00:00
©2024 by Simon Gilbert.
ABOUT THE AUTHOR
Simon Gilbert is an Irish writer. His short story âPerfect Waterâ won the 2023 MairtÃn Crawford Award for Short Story. When not reading or writing, heâs obsessing over music, cooking, or raising houseplants. He lives in Belfast.
To learn more about the author and this story, read the Author Spotlight
NotRob
Isabel Cañas | 870 words
* * *
CW: pregnancy, implied cannibalism.
* * *
When my daughter was a newborn, I found I only had the attention span to write micro and flash; I wrote a lot of it. I was also sleeping very little at night and crashed most afternoons, which for me is when the weirdest dreams happen. âNotRobâ was one of them.
âIC
Iâm in the living room with Rob when thereâs a knock at the door. He looks up from his bowl of cereal with detached interest.
His face drains to gray.
âOh.â He swallows. âNo.â
We rent a craftsman house. The door has an ornamental window; I can see whoâs standing outside. Generally, I donât like it. I donât want delivery guys seeing me eating cereal in my underwear on the couch next to my husband, like Iâm doing now.
I see my husband on the porch.
RobâRob but not, NotRobâknocks on the door.
âDo not open the door,â Rob cries.
My brain stumbles as I stand. Before I know it, Robâs on his feet and heâs seized my face, jerking my chin so that Iâm forced to look at him instead of NotRob.
âDo not look him in the eye.â
Heâs never touched me like this; I go straight into prey mode. This is bad, really bad, though I canât say why. My saliva just tastes like it.
âWe have to let it pass,â he says, firm as a mantra.
âI want to wake up from this dream,â I say, voice taut.
The anti-nauseas Iâve been taking for morning sickness wipe my sleep black and clean. I havenât had to break out of a nightmare in months. Iâm rusty.
Rob releases my jaw. âThis isnât a dream.â
âThatâs exactly what youâd say if it were one.â
I turn to go upstairs. Rob snatches my arms, gripping to bruise. âDo not look him in the eye.â
My heart thrashes my sternum. This feels thick and sticky and wrong. I have to force myself out of this.
âI am going to take a nap,â I recite. Iâve practiced and failed and succeeded; decades of night terrors have nothing on this spell. âWhen I wake up, this will all be over.â
Grief softens Robâs face. The taste of milk and cereal lingers on my tongue; it goes sour with doubt. My senses are too crisp, my pulse too heavy. I feel the hardwood beneath bare feet and the sweat on Robâs palms.
But I know how to get out of dreams. I will get out of this one.
I turn away as NotRob bangs on the door. I ignore his voice, which is garbled and tinny, a missive through a distant walkie-talkie.
Iâm halfway up the stairs when I hear the baby cry from the porch.
My breath cuts out.
My hand flies to my stomach.
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